


Seconds

by Ris84



Category: To All the Boys I've Loved Before Series - Jenny Han, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before (2018)
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-03-02 21:14:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18819130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ris84/pseuds/Ris84
Summary: Seconds matter.





	Seconds

**Author's Note:**

> This is a one shot that I could connect to a story line. I can't get it out of my head after watching the movie a few weeks ago.

Seven years. It feels like it’s an eternity but yet not nearly long enough. A third of their lives. He was her only boyfriend, her only serious romantic relationship. She was his second girlfriend – but according to him (when times were good) she was his everything.  
They dealt with high school issues, the pain of juggling 4 years as a long distance relationship. One year of living together in a tiny apartment in Brooklyn. But now it felt like they were breaking. Not a giant crack in their bond, just little pieces crumbling off.  
She would eat dinner without him. He would go to the gym before she woke up. Sex was less and less. They would say it’s because they are tired from work and school, and their commute. They would say it’s because their neighbors listen to strange music at all hours of the day and it killed their sexy mood. 

But it’s not that.

They’re falling apart.

It’s ending. Slowly. Time has poisoned them. He’s not Peter K. She’s not Lara Jean. Now he goes by Grant professionally. Someone mixed up his first and middle name during his first internship and it stuck. She goes by her initials LJ, for simplicity getting tired of people misspelling Lara.

Its New Year’s Eve. They’re at a club. She was dancing on the dancefloor with him. For s brief moment they were almost back to normal. Greg, who is in town to celebrate the new year, pats Peters back as he passes and said “Shots!” with a level of enthusiasm that only Greg can muster for tequila.  
Typically Peter would have taken Lara Jeans hand and tugged her to follow. But something in him told him she didn’t want that. She isn’t the biggest fan of tequila. He puckers his lip in the motion of booking a kiss and winks at her.  
She smiles and dances on her own. They both don’t have an idea of what time it is.

At some point, after Greg, Peter and the others are having their second shot, the DJ announces that it’s one minute until the count down. Peter looks over at the dancefloor for Lara Jean. He can see the crowd has caused her to move a slight bit further away. They make eye contact and start to move closer to each other.

You ring In the new year with the person you want to spend the rest of the year with.

 

Thirty seconds.

The crowd moves back and forth. Like air in a lung inhaling and exhaling.  
They’re maintaining eye contact. There is a shared pained expression. They know what’s going to happen.

Ten seconds.

A man who is taller than Lara Jean has stepped into his line of sight.

Nine seconds.

She can see his arm, his wrist where the watch she got him for their fifth-anniversary glints in the lighting.

Eight seconds.

They see each other. They’re no closer together.

Seven seconds.

The crowd is so loud. Counting down. 

Six seconds.

It’s hot.

Five seconds.

He muscles his way a little closer.

Four seconds.

She ducks under a couple and makes her way a little closer.

Three seconds.

They aren’t going to make it. He knows this. But he still tries. They still try.

Two seconds.

Did he even tell her how beautiful she looked today? This week? This month?

 

One.

Tears are forming in her eyes. She feels the stinging. She can’t believe they’re not beside each other. This has never happened.

Happy New Years.

They’re still at least 20 feet apart. But it could have been 20 miles. They’re almost there. But they didn’t make it. People have paired up. Kissing their way into the new years. Clutching their loved ones. 

Now that it’s already the new years, they finally meet. But the magic has depleted so rapidly that a small kiss and whispers of I love you and happy New year is all they muster.

They’re falling apart. And they both know it.


End file.
